Been forced to twerk as part of my exercise regiment .
Do you know how hard that is at my age ?
Gosh !
Was so embarassed at my first most feeble , worse than a spastic zombie , attempt that I spent hours poring through youtube videos of black women waving their ass in the air .
Many weeks forward , I think my technique is highly susceptible to a malfunction .
For the up and down style ...
my booty wants to go down but then a muscle cramps up and the tailbone refuses to budge . When the tailbone gives the ok , somehow my thighs turn so rock hard , a vein might get displaced if I insist on my behind pointing down towards the parquet .
I've sort of managed a very pathetic back and forth swing . Though I still think it looks pretty awful till sometimes I think I'm recreating what a taser induced spasm looks like .
Anywayyyyyy .....the above picture sums up how I feel about the whole unfortunate episode . When one butt goes this way , the other ends up the other way .
Who knows , I may master it one day and stun a tribe in Congo ( maybe ) .
But until then I have to face a teen who gives me that crinkled look and although he knows something or two , refuses to divulge any secret ( just on the basis that I'm his mom and that's just gonna be downright gross of him to give me pointers on how to get my hip and pelvic swing right ) .
Wait till I strike a dab pose in front of your mates ....just you wait boy ...uh huh !
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