First and last time I'll ever buy a foot long cucumber

This is a foot long cucumber .

I've never seen nor bought one this big but I sure as heck went for it today .

See ?

I'm not kidding , it really is almost one foot long .

What's the problem actually ?

By right , there should be no problem .

Especially if it's that large and you chose it on the basis of it being easier to skin , deseed and prepare into a stew , 

yes , I'd rather do one rather than two .

Ok that sounded wrong .

Anyway , after I selected this particular cucumber , which by the way was kind of a freak since the rest in the pile were much smaller , I handed it over to the foreign worker to get it weighed and barcoded .

He flashed me a weird smile .

Wth.....

And made direct eye contact with me for what seemed like 5 blinks.

Damn .....

Then he did the necessary before handing it over to me with a smirk plastered across his face .

Ok , at this point , I just wanted to reach over and bat him on the head with this same club , I mean cucumber .

Crap .....

I've never felt so , so....you know .

Please , hah girls ,ladies , please chose a smaller cucumber and don't take the biggest one , EVER.

It's better to put more effort into peeling and deseeding ,than to have to endure an over imaginative male fantasizing over what you intend to do with the god forbidden foot long cucumber other than to just cook it and eat it !

Upturned eyes .

Facepalm .

Just wanna die .