How to get Ass Journeys of 03-27178000 off your back for good

Yesterday evening, I received a call from one of the most googled numbers in Malaysian cyberspace 03- 27178000 relative of 03- 20357230 and other crappy lines . But of course, I didn't know that yet until later. 

She : Are you miss so and so ?

Me  : Yah, what is this about ?

She : launches into a Mandarin tirade of telemarketing pitch

Me  : ( Krik krik krik krik )

She : ( stops to take a breath )

Me   : I did not understand one word of what you just said to me. What is this about actually ?

She : Oh, if you cannot understand Mandarin, I can speak in Cantonese to you

Me  : No, I can only understand English. What is this about again ?

She : I am calling from Ass Journeys

Me   : WHAAAAATTTTT ??????

She  : Eyah, I am from Ass Journeys and we ah selling insurance

Me   : Ooo...I see, now, what I want to know is WHERE DID YOU GET MY NUMBER FROM ? 

She  : Oh, haha, you know, when you sign up for membercard, any membercard, you know ,  ahaha that's where we get your number from

Me  : Oooo...and what are you trying to sell me hah ?

She : We are selling insurance, you know , for hospital ah,  blablabla

Me  : CHOIIIIII !!!!! Eh, you know ah ? Now is getting close to Chinese New Year and you call me up and hope that I WILL BE ADMITTED INTO A HOSPITAL IS IT ? 

She : ( still trying to play chirpy )

Me  : how do people normally take your call hah ? Very nice is it you call up people and say this to them ?

She : Huh ? Um....

Me   : Do you honestly expect me to play along with you ? 

She : Ar...

Me  : Eh, some more ah, I've never even heard of your company. What is Ass Journeys ? What is this man ? 

She : Ah, okay lor, like that hor, never mind lor, if you are not interested ...

Me  : HAAAA !!!! YOU KNOW AH ? I TELL YOU AH, YOU'D BETTER YOU STRIKE MY NAME OFF YOUR CALLING LIST OR I....

She : ( Slams the phone ) 

Anyway, I then google the number and found that it belonged to Ace Jerneh. Pronounciation also fail, that woman. 

Ass Journeys, Ass Journeys, sounds very good meh ? Cheh !

Anyway, here's the how to annoy the heck out of them till they feel they have to break the company phone : 

1. first of all do not speak the language they are comfortable with . Speak in tamil , tagalog etc . Reply on your terms and your terms only.

2. sound totally rude , hostile and unreasonable

3. question them back

4. spit fire , hiss and growl over the phone

5. and if all else fails, tell them all your woes and problems with the neighbours lah, online buying lah , any boring irrelevant story will do.

The goal is to make them slam the phone on you. Half the battle is won when that happens.